April 1, 2006: New York, NY: Ricky Carmichael, the current leader in the AMA Supercross Series and 13 time motorcycle champion, has been cloned according to sources in New York City.

Dr. J. David Cerebellum of John E. Hopkins University explains the procedure: “Suzuki asked us some months back what the possibility of cloning was with Mr. Carmichael. They told us motocross is a young man’s sport, they enjoyed the recent publicity with Mr. Carmichael’s wins, and were looking to protect their investment for the future. We began as all other cloning procedures do – with a mouse.”

Dr. Cerebellum continues ” As it became time for the procedure to clone Mr. Carmichael, the inside of his mouth was swabbed at his home in Florida, and the cells FedEx’ed in a refrigerated container to the University here. After that the process ran smoothly, and to date Suzuki is pleased with the results. I think the recent showing at the Phoenix supercross proves what science and money can accomplish.”

The recent Phoenix supercross was the first time the cloning experiment was put to the test under racing conditions, with amazing results. Ricky Carmichael claimed the top three positions. Kevin Windham was fourth, and James Stewart fifth.

The Ricky Carmichael that finished first said “Awesome! My Makita Suzuki ran great!”

The Ricky Carmichael that finished second said “I’m bummed with second place, but my Suzuki ran great. Ricky just beat me tonight.”

The Ricky Carmichael that finished third said “My Suzuki ran great, but I didn’t. Third sucks. At least I picked up 67 points tonight by getting all three podiums positions – that’s something I’ve never done before – that’s pretty good.”

Mel Harris, Head Honcho over at American Suzuki, was overhead saying “Wait till everyone hears about this – we’ve got the number 4 Suzuki on all three podium positions! How’s that for taking branding to the next level? I can just see the headlines now … “Mr. Mel Harris – Motorcycle Executive of The Decade!”

Click on any of the photos below to view the larger image that shows the three Carmichaels on the podium:

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RC Cloned! Amazing photos! - Photo 1 of 3
RC Cloned! Amazing photos! - Photo 2 of 3
RC Cloned! Amazing photos! - Photo 3 of 3

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